I started feeling worthless around 13. I remember being home alone one evening and taking a knife out of a drawer and just starting at it for a long time. I've never cut myself, and I've long considered myself a failure for not being able to follow through with something I've been so obsessed with for so long.
Over the last 20 years my depression had ranged from mild to completely physically and mentally debilitating. I've been on 10 different medications, and while some of them have helped, I am absolutely non-compliant with meds. I'm starting to accept that is just something I will always have to deal with.